I have entertained the school of thought that the classic Disney fairy tales have warped and twisted the perceptions of love for young girls everywhere. I mean you look at Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty. They fall head over heels in love with good looking men who just appear out of nowhere who have only proven the capability to carry a tune by the time that the damsel in distress has decided the man of her dreams has arrived to lift her from that distress. Of course, he’s royalty, so that makes it all okay.
Well, while some of my judgment of the situation does remain (i.e. Snow White should have been a blonde), I have decided that I do still like the Disney fairy tales. Because they appeal to a girlish innocence that is so quickly lost in the growing up pressures of middle school through high school and even into adulthood, I feel that every once in a while indulging in that “girly” side is a good thing.
That being said, I have sought to redeem the Disney Fairy Tales by compiling from them the character traits that I know I would appreciate in a man. So I’m going to focus on the princes and justify, for girls everywhere, that Disney has not warped or twisted anything by their silly representations of shallow relationships. You can draw, from all of these men, character traits of THAT man.
Prince Charming – sings
I know I said Snow White was a doofus, but you know, Prince Charming sang to her. He was a tenor, which was lame, but it doesn’t matter. I think that having a guy that is willing to sing to you, regardless of how he sounds, is beautifully romantic. It speaks to a passion that he is willing to express. I wouldn’t care if he has to carry a tune in a bucket, as long as he’s loud enough that I can hear him.
Prince Phillip – fights for his girl and talks to his horse
So Sleeping Beauty was a blonde, but this isn’t about her, this is about Prince Phillip who you are introduced to as he rides through the forest. When he hears her contra-soprano screeching, he stops and talks to his horse. I always liked that about him. He loved his horse. He talked to him. He had a name for him. He cared. It wasn’t just another horse to him or an animal that he just used. He had a working relationship with his horse. I want a man who doesn’t take anything for granted, let alone his horse!
Then at the end when all hell breaks loose, Prince Phillip takes his sword and slays the dragon while his lady is blissfully unaware. I wouldn’t mind somebody who is willling to go to great lengths for me and to be okay with it even if I never really understand what he did. It just says that he doesn’t need any other glory except me.
Aladdin – rise to glory
So I know that Aladdin isn’t really a prince, but he has an awesome rising up, overcoming story. It isn’t that he rises from a street smart kid to a prince, it’s that he overcomes a lot of his character flaws along the way. Somebody who is willing to work at it and to overcome and to change and to be changed and to mature, continuously until death do us part, is somebody I want to be around.
Cinderella’s Prince – dances/sees
It doesn’t have to be in a moonlit garden or at a formal ballroom. I just want a man who will spin me around the living room now and then. Again, it speaks to expressing a passion. You know, the best thing about that Prince Charming is that he goes looking for her and when he sees where she lives and who she is, he still accepts her and wants her. Because he sees (clairvoyantly, through that one moonlit dance) her for who she really is despite the condition she is presently in.
The Beast – better qualities drawn out
Well, he had a rough time of it, that’s for sure. But the Beast had some humavn qualities that were definitely drawn out of him by Belle’s presence. He became more gentle, more fun, more patient, less angry. All of the good things about him were complimented by her being there. I would like to be with somebody that I compliment like that.
Prince Eric – responded to a voice
So I have to say that Ariel the Little Mermaid is my favorite and so I have always liked Eric by default. And I always thought he was thickheaded until just now. Well, can you blame me? He spent the entire movie looking for a girl right under his nose! But… this is cool… he only recognized that she was the one by her voice. He needed to hear a voice. That was what he was looking for. I want a man who recognizes me by Yahweh’s voice.
So, there you are ladies and gentlemen, now you know better.
Disclaimer: this list does not represent my comprehensive and detailed “man list”, nor shall such a list be made available for distribution via Facebook or any other media. Individuals may request copies of my “man list” by filling out the 20 page application. Viewing rights will be pending approval of the application by my authorities.